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SOULSEEKER
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Subject: POLITICAL correctness---
Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America ,
Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as'HILLBILLIES.'

You must now refer to them as
APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS .


And furthermore





HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:





1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a





' BREASTED AMERICAN.'





2. She is not 'EASY' - She is





'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'

(this one's cool)












3. She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a





'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.'





4. She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a





'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.'





5. She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes





' VERBALLY REPETITIVE.'





6. She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a





' LOW COST PROVIDER.'





HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:





1. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a




'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.'





2. He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is





' OVERLY CAUCASIAN.'





3. He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' - He




' INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.'





4. He is not 'BALDING' - He is in




'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.'





5. He does not act like a 'TOTAL ASS' - He develops a case of




RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.'











6. It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants - It's


'REAR CLEAVAGE.'


yippeeeeee

Time Posted: April 2 2009 02:00 pm EDT
Last updated: November 5 2009 04:51 am EST


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